Today is a wonderful day, friends. A momentous day. Today marks the beginning of a new era. I have given up. On life, on happiness, friends, family, on 43, on everything. No longer will I be burdened by things like productivity or cleanliness. From here on out I will, as my constant companion Johnny Cash would say, "Go shuffling out of life just to hide in death a while." Not that I'm suicidal mind you. I've simply decided to accept the fact that things are what they are and aren't going to improve nor change. So, I've given up. I stayed in bed today until 2 pm, crawled out from underneath the safety of the blankets, put on my Rick Astley t-shirt and the socks I wore yesterday, and began drinking beer in my boxer shorts. Loneliness? Depression? Hopelessness? These things are of no importance to me now. So now, at (wait for the second hand to reach 12...) 2:49 pm, I begin my new un-life. And I implore you to join me. Life is grand when you've given up.
